Today is a day I will tell you in a story when you are older. Today dad and I went to see Dr. Slater. She is a doctor who is helping mom and dad conceive you. We have been seeing her since July of 2009. We have had 4 unsuccessful attempts at conceiving you via IUI and are now moving on to a more aggressive technique called IVF (In Vitro Fertilization). That is where they create you outside of me and put you back in to grow.
Your dad and I were nervous as we waited 45 minutes for our appointment. Yesterday when I got the heart wrenching news that I was not pregnant, I was really sad. Then I was mad that it's almost 2 years of trying to have you and I have failed. So needless to say I wasn't very patient while waiting for our appointment.
Basically they think mom has something called "endometriosis" and it is preventing me from getting pregnant on my own. So we have been advised that we need to bypass my pelvis altogether and create you on the outside.
I just want you to know that even though you aren't here with us yet you are so dearly loved. Even your grandparents love you and talk about you often. We talk about names together all the time. Everyone is so excited to meet you! And no matter when you come, you will be our miracle.
Grandma and I went to lunch today. When I told her about us considering IVF she cried with joy. She kept saying how excited she was! (I swear she already has your crib picked out)
Yesterday my hope was taken from me. And today a small piece of that hope was restored. And I know I will heal but it will take awhile. Maybe I will nickname you Hope. For you will restore all the hope that has has been lost in me.
I love you my darling. Your dad loves you precious child.
Mom
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